♯ iPodding Well Hope They Meant It ! ♯

  On a rather quiet bus ride home this morning, I was aware of a pair of female passengers a few seats up on the opposite side, looking round a few times.  I didn't know them so continued to stare out the window, listening to my music regardless.  It wasn't until we were all getting off at the terminus that things became clearer.  

Unplugging my earphones to thank the driver and in readiness to cross the busy road, one friend said to the other, loudly, and for my benefit:

"I think it's rude having to listen to other people's music on buses."

( Yikes! - I had the volume up a tad too high for the past couple of miles! )

The friend replied:

"I know!  AND she must have been about 40 as well! " 

I turned 51 in January.  Cheers ladies!    

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☼ Depressive Dan? ☼

He wanders round the tenements 
all broken glass and dust
Pride's gone out the window
hard to cope and readjust

No jobs or second chances
just the mighty hand of fate
Who clips you round the lughole
if your patience fails to wait

A trail of pure stagnation
answers economic fuss
Not many other topics 
for the worried to discuss

Houses held in high regard
now derelict and damp
Wall to wall frustrations
in the glow of spirit lamps

Fingers crossed for food banks
and offers to wet nurse
What's the point of popping off those clogs
you can't afford a hearse!

Hunger pangs and ulcers
colds attacking to the core 
Be glad of stuffy noses 
now that hygiene's out the door!


Everyone in equal wanton
stuck like glue to the same spot 
Where it matters not an inkling
if you're family or not

So, what held these folks together
down this cold and bitter path
The belief in healing music
the capacity to laugh

Life throws misfortune at you
hurls your beating heart downhill
Flirty notes and sense of humour then......
they'll never break your will

© Pernickety Nell  2015

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☆ Here Boy! ☆

I don't normally upload clips from talent shows.  I don't even continue to watch them after the seriously-deluded contestant stages are over.  But even I had to admit that the ultimate winner of this years Britain's Got Talent, really touched me.   Even had me wiping away a tear at the end.

A clever trainer, a clever dog, telling a funny and cleverly structured, touching story.  No need to watch the whole video as it's all just judges comments at the end, but give it at least 3 minutes and I guarantee you you'll have a lump in your throat by then.  Even I, a lifelong cat lover, had to put my feline-biased praises aside for a bit to make way for this little canine star.

  

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♥ Ma, Paw, Aunts and Uncles An Aw' ♥

I was delighted to know and see again, my mother and father's wedding photo taken on Dec 24th , 1947.  When you've a vast family and these few treasured snaps go AWOL, it's a relief in knowing that the picture is indeed, still in existence.  I quite coincidentally saw it through my 11 year old niece's snaps now she's fallen prisoner to Facebook but I'm still not clear on whose physical care the photograph is in.  Our family is spread far and wide, with it's complications but it's pretty apparent that we (and I'm hugely guilty of this myself) are getting on a bit ourselves and need to tie the ropes a bit tighter and one or two of us need to bite our tongues more.  

My mother looked the same most of her life - had beautiful skin and few wrinkles - but I can't believe my dad once looked so young!  I'm uploading it in all it's tattered glory but will edit it as near to it's former glory as I can later on.  If only their marriage (which amazingly lasted till my mother's death in 1988) had kept the beauty of this photograph. 

      My mother, Margaret, father Robert, Best Man Uncle Alex, Bridesmaid Auntie Nancy, and flower girl, Auntie Rita .....picture taken in the Co-operative Hall in Falkirk

And Aqua Promised

Apologies for not being around much - I do try to get a poem popped if I can - life is very hard and hectic at the mo - but I will catch up with you all in a few days........promise!
                         ----------------------------------------------------------
Stood on the enticing bow
overboard but don't know how

A cooling comfort, tingled skin
aqua waves, immortal sin

Hanging on to flotsam junk
my vain pretences now all sunk

No life vest on, a heart in drought
whose lighthouse beam has just gone out

Still falling, ever falling deep,
chasing that elusive sleep

Saturation, breathing pains
saline reminders, drying veins

Crystal clear comes to my aid,
helps me fuel this this lone cascade 

Floating through a bowl of stars,
night time reflections leaving scars

Midnight ocean, sink me far
however lonesome or bizarre

Just let me wake among the sands,
where Neptune ruled the bedded land.
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join in the challenge - Magpie Tales
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No Hang Ups Then?

Thanks for ruddy nothing, you've done it once again
made me pace outside the theatre like a half demented hen!

Your timekeeping is rubbish, always last out of the door -
said you'd be there for three-thirty now it's almost half past four!

I'm squelching and I'm dripping and my nerves no longer cope
mascara's running down my cheeks, my brolly's lost all hope!

My bag and it's belongings catered for our evening out - 
with sweets and crisps and programmes, tins of lemonade and stout.

Well,  I'm effing off without you, back home to my little pad
whose threshold you won't cross again, it's really rather sad!

So I'm taking off my hat and ring and cozy up inside - 
won't be seen with you nor taken for another ride!

But I'll keep the phone plugged to the wall, the back door just ajar -
mute the sound and maybe listen for the engine of your car

The chocolate must be Belgian, washed down with fizzy drinks - 
the bouquet huge and made up of - apologetic pinks!!!

Johnny's Journey Hame

The viaduct holds ever near, whispers for the heart to hear,
inhale that vast majestic view, before the town rolls unto you
And resurrects straight from the station, patriotic aspiration,
Mother, in her allied skin, ignites a pride from deep within

Where dire skies could never take, clouded visions for one's sake,
home to clear and died for dales, and fair skinned Annie's up for sale
A hero's mini-welcome home, where stories thrive and bravely roam,
missing all the echo closes, tenements, and I supposes

Young mums kept up all night long, bairns shoogled sound by song,
night shift laddies, eyes red raw, sharing bedrooms, coughs an 'aw.
Thread and needle, make do and mend, becomes a rather valued friend,
candles burned out, flame remote, dark as the Earl of Hell's waistcoat

Children playing up outside, old Jen taken for a ride,
stealing sweeties from her shop, Hell to pay if they get caught
Contented weans, yet God believers, entertained by chalk and peevers,
far too many there to chase, all pacified by His good grace

Hunting by both rod and gun, pots of stew the size of drums,
hame made soup from duggie bones, Irn Bru and tattie scones
Eating grand when Johnny's back, home, and off the beaten track,
when every inch of every glen, must shape his shadow there again

A roll with Annie down the hill, all heather stalks and wanton will,
her kiss like satin on his lips, tingled toes and finger tips
A thistle's thorn could never sting, away the pain that absence brings,
just promises in jeely jars, silver rings, and battle scars

Much later, after Sunday baths, piano songs and hearty laughs
the men smoke like a reeking lumb, till whisky knocks their senses numb
And morning mirrors heave a sigh, reminded of his next goodbye,
all uniforms and worried soul, preparing for his chosen role

Off now young man, one time more, as conflict may knock on our door -
a muckle train takes you away,  as glorious as come-what-may
A Flying Scotsman's younger brother, wrenching firstborn from it's mother
a route from which one can't depart - the train-tracks of a soldier's heart
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since this week's prompt hails from my motherland, I went on a nostalgic journey using some Scottish vernacular.  I think most will work out the words for themselves but give me a shout if their are any queries...... 

Never Trust A Toilet Mirror!

A trusted friend I had in you
solely hanging in the loo
Lighting up above the sink
framed in bright flamingo pink

Helped as I made up my face
a lipstick kiss I'd soon erase
Little Miss Perfect in reverse
winks and pouts we would rehearse

You saw my tears and shared my shame
agreed, I won't do that again!
Unladylike from pees to vomit
zooming out me like a comet!

Heard my secrets and my farts,
got zit-pops down to a fine art
I'd bounce about in naked pride
and sing most ghastly as I dried

Then came the thought to rearrange,
my rooms in some domestic change
I fancied you out in the hall
t'was not a clever move at all

Looking pale and feeling shitty,
no longer sharing in my pity
Every time I went to tinkle
I never noticed that deep wrinkle!

I've never changed my food of late
yet you indicate I've put on weight!
Beauty should come from within
but I'm worried by that double chin!

Does my dress cling on this tight?
I must have looked an awful sight!
My hair's not doing as it's told
all waves and knots and uncontrolled

My senses ask, is this a farse?
Just look at thee size of my arse!
I should be gorgeous, but can see,
you won't co-operate with me!

You're dull and hard and can't reflect,
a two-faced friend with low respect
Back in the bathroom, so it seems
or find yourself in smithereens! 

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A Sole And Her Sea

Walking home late from the tracks of my past
I peer at horizons, with souls ever vast

I breath in the sea air, and cry to the night
as front waves appear in the sodium light

As lonely an isle with a lighthouse of love
whose beam is fast fading and yet to shine of

No lovers returning, no aquatic potion
just cold crashing loss between hearts and the ocean

Yet under the water swim thousands of you
temperate actions and hullabaloo

Shifty and scared, brave, taking chances
bullying, battling, swift primal dances

Gathering shoals of different kinds
colours that blend, others that blind

Shaping your world as nature intended
instinctively loving, a partner defended

I could capture you all, my ultimate prize
tossing back those I may come to despise

With all of you fishes held under the sea
can't one come ashore and try capturing me?
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Dear Adam

Dear Adam,

Next time you want to slice an onion, and you're too lazy to rewash the chopping board, could you not use the back of the phone directory.  It was the smelliest search for a number I've had.  Ever.

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I Want One That's Not Chocolate!

                              Sorry this one is a bit late - trying to catch up over the Easter holiday.  
                                                      Just a quick effort with little tones of my own Easter childhood!


Every year on  Easter Sunday
shiny shoes and cotton shirts,
All that Sunday Best malarkey
bored to death in that huge church

Hymn books open ready
morbid songs they make you sing
Hold your breath next to old Charlie
or inhale that  musky ming!

In the morning came a visit,
Easter Bunnies clad  in blue?
Just nutters in a onesie,
fooling nobody but you!

Little lamb a-bounding,
with energy galore
Till the day he's on the menu
feeds a family of four

Hens-a-constant laying
eggs-on-the-constant boil
Colours, faces, and cool patterns
for us to smash and spoil

Gee - all those shit straw bonnets
piled as much as you damned please
Then a prize for putting up with
hostile birds and angry bees

It's sad to hear the story
crucifixes, rolling stones
All forgotten once the wine flows
with no sin there to atone

When He's born we're given presents,
given chocolate when He dies
Forgiven each hypocrisy
before His very eyes

Such memories to last me,
arms so full of daffoldills
Stolen from a nearby cemetery
looks nice upon your sill

Same time again, then, everyone
school holidays of Yore
From Fridays through to Mondays
bring about that tin foil war
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♥ PrettyBoy's And Girls Come Out To Play ♥

Really looking forward to my son's engagement party this Friday.  Out of all the PrettyGals below (and quite a few more not in pictures!) at last he's found Thee One.  He's always been a bit of a player outside his band's heartthrob drummer status, but I've fond memories of his Girls of Yore.....(and some not so fond!)  Now my baby's growing up!  Not in any hurry for grand-babies just yet, but I'll buy a ball of wool in just in case.....................

                                                              Stacey

                                        
                                                             Emma

                                                  Dionne

                                                    Nicola

                                                   Lichelle

                                    
                                          Carlene

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It's nice to know he's at last settling down.  I just hope at the ultimate alter he doesn't do a Ross from Friends and get his women mixed up! 

Familiar Steps

       The prompt looks similar to my own town, so I took things from there (we're mostly well behaved) but I'm referring to street night life in towns all over. 

'Come unto me', the borough sighs,
amid the air its streets supplies
Offering a multitude 
of promises, the night exudes

Cobbles making ankles twist,  
shines sequins dresses through the mist 
Ladies dominate the clubs
and smirks at all the men she snubs 

Venues oozing pitchy beats
while skin and speakers overheat
Euphoric verse from local bands
as strangers hold each other's hands 

A blind spot found to consummate
that pent up vibe hormones equate
No safety sake and such like sins
watched over by store mannequins 

Alternate night life rarely sought, 
where armies ran and soldiers fought
Replaced by battles outside bars, 
the rush of trains and midnight cars

Homeward boundings of the younger
slaves to mashed heads and false hunger
Statue crowned with traffic cone
whose iron heart has turned to stone

Unmarked cop cars cruise along
preserving peace and drunken song
Until the city's whisper ends

preparing for its deepest cleanse

And in the morning, bang on six, 
the scars of late post-teenage kicks
are strewn like litter on the breeze 
contagious and desired disease

Noise and clutter reign again
business cards and fools campaign
In my town there, familiar screams
till evening's bursting at the seams

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Ordinary (Kinda) Days 9

It has, at last, been weather-able to spend some time out in the garden.  Just a general tidy up as it's a bit too early for The Cheaper Half to plant his seedlings and stuff.   Anyhow, seeing as it was the week-end, before my mucky duties, I opened a bottle of Chianti  11.30 am latish afternoon to help kick-start things off.  

Our poor back garden fence has been crying out for a lick of lacquer for yonks and today I answered it's poor needs. I was creosoting along quite the thing until coat number two and there before one was a message, glowing fairly brightly, wishing our neighbours  'A Happy Christmas From Adam'.  Somehow the greeting that PeaPod wrote on the fence with snow-spray stuff years ago had illuminated.  That giving hubby something else to moan about, my futile attempt to part-cheer and part-seduce by means of a washing pole-dance failed miserably.  Trying to kid my body into thinking it was 20 years slinkier saw me hitting my foot off our nearby strawberry fence in mid swing and resulted in me landing on my arse and squashing some new strawb plants.  Boy am I in the gardening bad books!

To make matters worse - while tidying our front garden - we got captured in conversation with the one neighbour in the street the the rest of us try to avoid. God, this woman can yap for ages about utter, utter tripe.  Before long she puts you into a dialetic coma.  Edging away from her is no good as she just raises her voice!  Talk about buckets of shit and whisks - she seems to knoweveryone's business. We do have the ''there's somebody on the phone''  trick down to a fine art if PeaPod is home!

In a jollier stunt this week, we did get quite a good view of the eclispe.  We saw it quite by chance on route to our GP with old misery guuts here.  Daylight did gear off a bit and looking to the sun (without glasses) there was a very defined slice of sun and moon.  It only lasted around 30 secs but it was fairly spooky when the sun path in the distance come rushing back towards us. I almost expected to float....! 

I was somewhat intrigued by the re-burial of Kind Richard III on the news.  It seemed emotional for some during the service and I did comply with the minute's silence.  His new resting place is now Leicester Cathedral as opposed to the Leicster car park they say he was found under.  It's all good and respectful like, but I'm finding it a bit difficult to believe.  I mean - you never even got cars, never mind car parks in medieval times.  How easy is it to lose a King in the first place?  Rule Britannia my arse!

Rounding off the week - my older son managed a visit with his brother at home, and seeing them out the back having a kick about was very heartwarming.  I usually take snaps of such rareties but unfortunately my camera battery charger is lost and I've not replaced it as yet.  Just as well I'm a talented artist and managed to sketch a picture from memory. Here's *hiccup* to the next O(K)D.........

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♥ - Woody Woody Wuv Hearts - ♥

                  

                                                                                 Kept things simple and silly this week!
Still standing there, that rugged tree
adopted by both you and me

we watched the world from way up high
all love 'n' stuff  into the sky

our perfect hide-away from school
playing both the owl and fool

a knight clad in maroon and grey
you stole my very soul away

just off that homebound shaded path

we kissed, we climbed, we sung, we laughed

catching leaves that fluttered down
you twisted them into a crown

for I became your wood princess
all floaty in my week-end dress

fading then regaining shoots
deciduous  from hair to roots

with careful chips we carved our heart
the time had come now to impart

it meant so much, so much to me
us spending time around that tree........................................

adult years now bring me back
retracing steps and stirring tracks  

announced yet in the here and now
amid the blossom, bark and bows

an arrow thwacked and cutting through 
initials joining me and you

a solid tree destined to last
oh, how these years have whizzed by fast

my first true love, my heart's big deal
oh how I wished that you were real 
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Streets Petite

Just a rushed job from me this week - mind went into cantbearseditis and stated there tonight - I may return tomorrow to edit. This is fairly shitty!  

A patriarchal landmark traditional and tight
  not obsolete nor populous just sweetnesses and light 

Little village luring, with a wry historic smile
  cobbles, gaols  and folklore to both frighten and beguile, 

Curves along with character, mysterious and proud,  
  always something happening but very seldom loud

Gulls a constant nightmare with their daring swoops and pecks
  shops and public houses gain the utmost of respect

Floral scents and sea foods, pastries and parfait
  a potent breath of yesteryear for you to take away 

Houses thatched and steadfast, reach the roof edge as you stand
  streets' adjacent windows sees the neighbour's holding hands

The huge protecting steeple guarding all within it's view
  counts more visitors than residents forever held in lieu

Return for pure perfection never-tainted souvenirs
  a whisper venerating for the whole wide world to hear

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Feel free to  join Magpie Tales via this link

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Dear Adam

Dear Adam,

Please remember to put a note on the shopping board to say we've run out of shampoo and conditioner.  Washing machine liquid pouches do a pretty shit job of untangling bedraggled manes.......

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Froth Off

Nein! Nein! Nein!  It's bathtub time
    should cleanse the guilty and sublime

Staring, daring in the raw to
   bubble up within Grimm's law

Praying, staring at the door
   the slightest noise one can't ignore

Eva's razor left behind, no Braun
    to make sure her blades glide

Dirty, flirty boots to clean
   a fuhrer's passion so pristine

Quelling, smelling, edelwiess
    few words said but so concise

Actor, factor, years to come
   secrets washed with bath ring scum

Nein Nein Nein!  It's bathtub time
    be careful with that dirt and grime

Hates, berates each finest hour
    refuse his offer of a shower.............................

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