October 27, 2009

Happy Hollereen....*sniff* ...I'll Miss You!

I might not get the chance to post in time for Halloween. It might be the last of any future Halloween pictures - for a good while anyway. My kids are too old now and Trick or Treat is so popular round our area that I think I'll be forgiven for not joining in for a bit. It will be the first time in fifteen years that I'll not have contributed.

I'm posting some pictures of last Halloween. My wee sister lives in a block of flats with buzzer entry so it's difficult for kid's to get access so I threw a little solitude party for my niece instead. The pics will pretty much speak for themselves. My sister followed us with her camera.

Indoors in Scotland it is traditional to 'dook for aipples!' A basin filled with water, with apples and monkey nuts floating in it and a fork is all it takes. You have to put the fork in your mouth, hands behind your back, aim, let go and try to 'stab' the apple to eat! (Rachel didn't cheat - honest!) It's messy, wet, but so much fun. Now she's at school it'll be parties there from now on. Silly really but it kinda hurts to have closure on such an event. But my time really is needed elsewhere now.

ps.......I just love the pic where the 'Witch' gets a fright &...... Cat's Halloween...!

October 24, 2009

Beauty and the Beasts...!

I very rarely judge other peoples' children. I don't think there is the perfect parent out there either. But there is a group of mum's - and sometimes dad's - that I don't understand. The Beauty Pageant ones. How can mothers display their daughters like so? And the lengths some go to!

I watched a few episodes through the week (another bout of insomnia!) while channel surfing. It almost made me cry. Not for the joy of watching a crown being placed on the winner's head but how these poor little girls' future expectations of the world might be.

The programme follows 2 girls in particular per episode and I could hardly believe the way they were forced into dance routines, and structured how to 'walk' and 'smile' properly. Being heavily berated for a missed movement. Forced into make up of ridiculous levels. It was more rivalry they displayed with the other contestants than after a bit of fun. Mums hollering at them, tutting from the audience if the poor kid didn't answer questions quickly or cute enough. And the make up on some of them! False eyelashes, I even seen a kid being made to wear false teeth as she had a few gaps from where her milk teeth fell out. Spray tanning!! Then they're trussed up with hair that's far too old for them, wearing dresses like bog-roll ladies from the 70's that cost a fortune.

There is this little British kid called Sasha, 11, I've also read about whose role model is a much older 'glamour model' who bares boobs and buffed up bits for photo shoots or nights out. Her mother supports her child's fantasy future of one day perhaps becoming as 'famous' by popping her tits out in the local and national papers. I bet she must be looking forward to that day of publication. The poor kid even said she doesn't care that her schools grades are low. Glamour and fame is her future. So, could it be some of these mums are living vicariously through their daughters? Or is it in fact simply a way of getting mother and child bonding in the style we females like to often do, with no future problems?

Look, I have a niece who's 5 and I adore her. Being in a house full of men I enjoy the female company when she stops over. We wear make up!! Rachel has me looking fabulous in minutes. Sparkly purple eye shadow on one eye, green on the other, mega-orange cheeks and bright red lippy! Then she combs my hair into her own (tuggy) unique style where the comb often gets lost. Sometimes she brings her crowns so we can play princesses. Sometimes we go to the shops like that!!Then once we're fed up we'll go into the garden and dirty our hands and nails digging for bugs and the worms that she loves snapping in two! Oi! We're still princesses you know - just evil worm hating ones! Then we'll share some food (after a long bath!) moan about about how 'rotten and smelly' boys are. Then off to bed with a good story and no thoughts as to how we'll pass tomorrow. Not in fear of silly steps going wrong. Or feeling the world will collapse if nothing is won. Or if our smiles or crowns are crooked.

Life shouldn't be mega-competitive for under 10's. I'm not saying these little girls don't have some fun out of it but it's the burden on their shoulders if they don't win that saddens me. Some of these mothers take their girls to every pageant they can and it costs them a fortune. PUT THE MONEY AWAY FOR THEIR FUTURE COLLEGE/UNIVERSITY YEARS INSTEAD WOMAN!

There, I feel better now! Glitz and glam will always be a part of most growing girls' lives. That's natural. And the competitive stages of how women look will kick in when they're about 15 or 16 where they compare clothes or want to look as good as so and so. But not that young.

I'll leave you with two pictures. One is of my niece Rachel and a rare picture of how one of these little mites may really feel. See if you can guess which is which.....?(She says sarcastically!)
ps..........I promise to post a picture of me the next time Rachel gives me a makeover - I'm stunning! Honest!

October 20, 2009

The 20 Year Hitch!

Yes, today we've reached that milestone. Had to climb many hills and had so many spills that I dare not think about them all. I've been married for 20 years now. I just found out that your 20th Anniversary is your 'China' one - which is very apt given all the plates and cups I've threw at him over the years! Never had a direct hit. Not with one of them! Kept Polycell in business well, so I've at least managed something good.

So what are Trevor and I going to be doing about it today? Bog all. I need an emergency extraction at the dentist, (which my daughter'll go ballistic about when she finds out! She's an RDN or 'Matron' as her work colleagues named her) and he's got the cold again. So I suppose a little moan together before bedtime will be the best we can do.

Marriage is a unity with so many odds against you. No guarantee it's gonna last. I showed him on facebook recently how easy it was to divorce him! Well, he kept interrupting me to look for google tips on killing chocobo's or similar for a ruddy computer game! But I doubt we'll ever part now. Although we have very little in common (really we don't) he still makes me laugh. Virtually raised the boys himself when they were little as I was never out of hospitals. Honestly, as with today, I went to the dentist looking forward to having my feet up for a bit. Not in the least bit scared of needles. Had more pricks than Kerplunk me and it shows right over the gynaecological region. But he's the biggest prick I've ever had. And I wouldn't want it any other way. Hubby, I doubt if you'll be reading this but:


And here we are on our wedding day. A simple do with family mostly, and that's my brother Rab with the fag in his gob! Never let it be said that I pick pictures with no class! Just look at how Trevor nervously fingers his tips. Yeah - you've done it now mate!
And us today where he's lost his hairline and I've lost my waistline! Well, all marriages are give and TAKE aren't they!!

October 18, 2009

Life's Big (and small) disCRAPancies.

I don't know where some people get off. How some dog owners think it's alright to let their pet drop it's back end, let out a steamy one and then just casually walk away. Abandonment. Some dogs get public praise for it, which is only fair as it's keeping to it's toilet-training bargain side of things but I'm sure if the dog could understand, it'd be appalled. Why is this still going on..?

The park next to my house is a haven for inconsiderate dog owners. The amount of times we mums in the street have had to clean our carpets and prize muck from soles on shoes is unbelievable . It's angering that a kid can't get a slide on a slide or swing on a swing without bringing home feaces on their shoes and clothes. Ironically, as they grew, we parents made sure that our children took turns in picking up litter (while trying to dodge the dollops) and used to get designated duty days.

Sadly, it brings needless shame to the true caring dog owners that live on our street and surrounding area. Even with park bins for the doggy-do to go in, and free poop scoop and bags from the local council, our park is still being abused. And the culprits aren't always busy families with busy lives but older and uppity owners (one with a big car and plenty of golfing time to kill). They'll be toodling off home to a neat garden and stain free carpets. I swear if I knew their addresses I'd post a few neatly tied presents through their letterbox.

The worst one is this retired lady. She has two lovely black Labradors. Mother and daughter. The older one always trails behind but on approaching the park it's arse goes into bowel release mode and it never makes it to the grass in time. It shits as it walks!! I've said to her a couple of times about it and she picked up right away then, but I get real miffed if I see the infamous dollops lying outside my neighbours' path. She knows it can only be her Lab doing this and must pass it on her journey back.

Anyhow, talking of crap, I've prattled on enough. Here's wishing you a happy and squish free walk home wherever you reside.

October 16, 2009

Totally Eggsited...!

This has been an excellent week. The biggest news is that after fertility treatment, my daughter has released an egg. Diagnosed with polycystic ovaries last October after 18 months of trying to conceive, there was fear that motherhood may not even happen but she seems to be progressing wonderfully. Fingers crossed - apart from her legs!

Of my oldest son's good news - his band, Casino, have received their confirmation date for playing King Tuts - a renowned Scottish venue and the biggest sought after performance stage!

Of my youngest son's good news - his band, No Need For Idols, have recorded their first demo, with amazing tracks for 15 year olds to have composed and have their new website up and running!

Now all I need really, for all 3 of them, is a direct hit - and my job here is almost done.

October 13, 2009

Violet Sky, Here We Go, Walk Away......coming to an ear near you very soon!

My youngest son and best friend Oliver have just arrived home from the recording studio, their band having just finished their first demo. As with Adam's brother's band, they're getting gigs galore, sometimes having to turn them down. Where do the years go? This picture below is Adam and Oliver 3 years ago when they were both 13 - little dreamers:
And messing in the garden:
Helping me support my favourite charity by way of their very first performance - still only 13:
And proud of it:Now 3 years on they've recruited new members and formed No Need For Idols and they've stormed into the semi-finals of our local Battle Of The Bands and today recorded their first demo? Children no more. Onwards boys!
So from left to right there's Callum, Oliver, David, Adam and Connor. I'll put in a link once their new songs are internet available - hopefully tomorrow!

Friends since they were six, and even with them attending different high schools, 'Addie and Ollie' have always been in touch and remain to stop over at each others houses, these days to write songs, instead of on walls - we'll sometimes their bedroom walls if inspiration can't wait for a note pad. Despite falling out a hundred times, they'll always be mates. They've never let a silly row last. For they know when somethings feel right......and now they're cementing that in song. Good Luck Guys! Maw's very proud of you!

and here's the link;

October 11, 2009

For Toasty!

Having endured lots of drum practice over the weekend, I reminded myself that there is another mum out there sharing thoughts, headaches and pride along with me. So Marmite Toasty I give you:

Ordinary (kinda) Days 2

Took a short time out to kick the washing machine as I still couldn't work out how to get the knob (not my cheaper half) to give me a cooler wash, so I had to succumb to getting Trevor to show me. I'm trying not to leave my carbon footprint in the world so much, although I thought the machine deserved a muddy one!

I noted that Adam (my youngest)'s head cold was getting him down. Worried that he was missing valuable time from his drama production (Disco Inferno) by way of moaning too much, I said I'd go over his lines ect, with him to cheer him up. Thought it a bit weird with the Kathy and Heathcliff characters and pictured strong winds and moors instead of dodgy clothes and mirror-balls. We ended up harmonizing to Foo Fighters 'Times Like These" instead which has nothing to do with the musical. Adam was a bit pissed when I told him that his voice actually sounded better with a bit of phlegm behind it!

Then I had a nice 'conversation' with a member of staff at my local bank when I realised that for the past three months I had been charged for being overdrawn while there was no record of it on checking my account online. They were suppose to waive a charge in August, so I think this is all a knock-on effect from that! I am waiting on a phone call back to see where the problem is lying. If only you could send punches down a phone line! Any banking experts out there feel free to help........

Then late evening I shouted at my older son who, for the past month STILL hasn't bought a router to go with his new laptop, as he preferred a vanity night out with the money instead. So the rows as to who gets on the computer (via modem) are still existing! At least I'm no longer scared as to what 'history' may pop up - or pop out!!

Apart from that - the usual!

October 03, 2009

(Un) Guilty Pleasure No 1.

There is something innate in all of us, that keeps us from being readily open to admit to liking certain somethings. A song, magazine, hobby, food choice, item of clothing, film, keepsakes ect. Simple things that we couldn't live without for it makes our day just that little bit easier to pass. It comes in all shapes, sizes and forms.

I used to be a bit paranoid when I revealed what my favourite 'show' was! After having cable television installed in 1996, I saw this programme once and I was hooked, but people scoffed so I tended to keep it to myself. It didn't have a fit bloke in it, nor was it a cartoon or Jerry Springer, or Scottish soap opera. It was Judge Judy!

I now say that with pride. I haven't missed an episode in the 13 years it's been available in Britain. On holidays or in class, reminders were always set or sent. Life wasn't worth living if anyone forgot to press that record button!

The woman is flawless in her judgements, never misses a thing. Compared to other Judgey shows (eat your heart out Brown, Hatchett and Ephriam) they just 'ain't got the primal flair of Judy. In, out, no mucking about. I adore her patter, balls, orderly structure, the way she reduces older children to tears if they try to piss her about and despite her eyebrows from Hell - compassion.

Sure, Judy is raking in millions from her shows, and I don't blame her. She's paid her dues tenfold. Her 25 years served as a family court judge has huge impact on her small claims courtroom results. Cases with children are the ones that fire her up the most if she feels kids are suffering at the hands of useless and selfish parents. And woe-betide any claiment that interrups her a time too many. But some of the things she's had to deal with in court! There even was an earthquake as she interrogated!

I have seen episodes where some-one was sued over a bit driftwood, a woman suing her 78 year old neighbour, as the old dear posted a community flyer through her door and her Jack Russell hurt it's leg jumping for up for it and wanted the poor old sod to pay the medical bills and two old men fighting over whose space for their garbage bins it was! She goes nuts at these ridiculous cases -nuts! But I suppose my favourite episode was when John Lydon (Sex Pistols) appeared suing his mate over music copyrights or something. He was effing and blinding a bit, but the ex-punk who vowed he would never say sorry to anyone, was forced by Judy to apologise to Byrd - her courtroom officer. He did, albeit a very sarcastic apology, but the very word parted from his lips! Go Judy! You are my heroine!

So there you have it. My guilty pleasure in the open. My adoration doesn't quite go to the lengths of the tattooed bloke , but I reckon a tee shirt with her face on it shouting 'Baloney' wouldn't be too criminal....!