February 11, 2014

Day Off Kiss Off

Oh no, your key turns in the lock
you're home an hour early!
I promised to clean out the car
and polish it till pearly!

Those bins are overflowing still,
forgot to shell the peas
There's no lentils in the lentil soup
expect no guarantees.

Forgot to take the doggie out -
slept right through the alarm
I guess one piddle up the wall
will do the house no harm

I tried my hand at hoovering -
some bloody noise that makes!
But I had to hide the evidence
of breakfast's crumbly cakes

See! The pile of clothes for ironing
no longer tops the chair,
(just crushed it all into a bag
that's underneath the stair!)

YaY! I watered all the indoor plants
with innocent intent
But overflowed the pots by using
metric measurement

Be careful as you walk around 
that shelf piled high with books
For that doggie piddle's not the only
sure relief he took!

And I know I said I'd weed the drive
but dandelions are tough
That 'L' shaped metal weedy thing
near took a nail right off!

I popped out quickly to the shops
where faced with a consign
Was a grocer so hell bent on selling
me a vintage wine  (hic)

In my favour (that's not faring well)
I managed to complete
The making of our king-sized bed
with every corner neat

I'm pure and simply guilty of
domestic misdemeanor
Now, I think it's time we walked that page
and found ourselves a cleaner

Oh, you know that you'll forgive me,
once my lips form their sweet pout
For I've juggled up your senses
and played annoyance out

Lets crush these satin bed sheets 
in this non-marital bliss
And seal our wreakless lifestyle
with a neat and tidy kiss.



richard said...

looks to me someone better get their butt in gear and get some work done!! or else!!

Helen said...

OK .. this is epic and so much unadulterated fun!

Kathe W. said...

this is a lot of fun! More fun than house tending!

Optimistic Existentialist said...

A kiss heals all :)

Karen S. said...

I like where you took us with this. Funny thing I kind of had that same guilty pleasure feeling with this too, like oh my she wants to play even as the dirty dishes climb on! Great magpie.

Friko said...

Well, you got that right. I bet a kiss wasn’t all that followed.

Cait O'Connor said...

This is a great poem. One for me to keep.

Tess Kincaid said...

This was fun...