The Sparkler

The robbers got away with it, a load of household goods
And silver, diamonds, gems and things -like a proper burglar should.
It happened to my neighbours - (she's a stuck up ruddy mare)
They came home to an empty house - them things they weren't there!

It had only been the sixth time that they'd holidayed this year
Such a shame, an awful circumstance when life is so austere!
They'd usually ignore me or avoid my very stare,
It's horrid being invisible when indeed you're blummin' there.

But today they rushed to ring my bell, and asked me if I saw
Anyone?  I shook my head and gave a loud 'pshaw'.
Of course I said I didn't (and it was a true egad)
But the answer might have doubled if I hadn't or I had.

So the Boys in Blue came visiting, insurances were called.
A story plead and things were said (situation NOT forestalled?!)
Anyhow, it settled down, things smoothed out as they wanted,
And lived the life of well-to-do, and loudly - how they vaunted.

A few months passed, and then at last came lots of sunny rays
My garden slowly budding life, brightened up the days.
I found my can eventually, hidden in the rough.
And went inside to fill him up with water and feedstuff.

Then I heard a little rattling, a scrapey-scrappy sound
I tipped my can right upside down and gasped at what I'd found.
Diamonds of pure craftsmen's work, sunk in heavy, golden chains
Oh, how life throws out circumstance and strangely does pertain.

So knocking hard upon their door, I handed them a gift
And a touching little goodbye card obtained thanks to their grift.
Alas, I am a-moving on, I'd love to "stay and chat!"
But there's so much to do now my deposit's on that flat!